Monday, March 25, 2013

And God Said "Walk With Me"

I think this has to be my favorite invitation given in the scriptures. To walk with the Creator of worlds without number. It doesn't say "walk behind me" to suggest that God sees us as inferior beings not worthy to be in His presence. Rather, the invitation is to "walk with me" or, I interpret it as "walk beside me". I have been incredibly interested in this passage of scripture and have spent the last two weeks or so fleshing it out in my personal study. Though no where near complete or satisfied on the topic I do have a few thoughts that are deeply person and provide a large foundation of my testimony.

First, is my interpretation of what this passage actually means. To me it rings of the attribute of obedience. More times than I can count, walking in the ways of the Lord are directly linked to keeping all His commandments and His laws. Yet obedience is more than just keeping the commandments and standing worthy of a temple recommend. That is the first level of obedience. The preparatory level if you will. The second level is complete obedience and submission to God's will. It is not only submitting your will to God but it is wanting what He wants for you that is, aligning your will with His. It is not praying for what you want and hoping God allows it, rather it is praying to know what God wants for you.

I have had far too many experiences with this but one of late has been very difficult. Recently I had to let someone go. Someone I loved very much. Not because I didn't care about them or because I didn't want them in my life but because I knew they were holding me back. That, while God was paces away beckoning me to walk with Him, I was attempting to keep up with a large stone shackled to my foot. What was worse is that the more frantically God called to me the more I tightened the chain because I wanted to have both. I wanted to completely dedicate my heart and soul to Him and still hang on to this person. Yet I have come to a realization, as hard as it is, that I cannot have both. I have learned that if I am to walk the road of discipleship this person cannot come with me.

Some may say that I am interpreting God's will incorrectly  but honestly, as I have traveled down this path, freeing myself of this burdensome stone and ran towards my Father and my Savior I have felt freedom and joy that I can't quiet explain. More than that I feel peace. Peace that I am becoming more like Him. That is my ultimate goal. I go forward with certainty that I will be able to give God every thing, including my heart, while I am gone. Some day there will be someone. A worthy, righteous priesthood holder that walks with God also and we will walk together, towards the Celestial Kingdom and our Lord.

I know this is a very personal post. If you're are still reading it kudos to you. With eight days left until I get set apart as a missionary I know that I have a lot to do for my physical, emotional and spiritual preparation. Yet I am so excited to get out and go to work. So ready to be healed by the constant presence of the Holy Spirit. To be lost in the wonderful guidance and influence of my Savior as I give my all to serving His children in Panama. It will be hard I know that. But I also know that with God all things are possible and I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me (Philip 4:13). Stay strong my dear readers and remember that when God calls and invites you to walk with Him, give up whatever you have to, to do it. More than that, never look back at the things He asks you to leave because it is for your own good that you are abandoning them. Ultimately it will bring you more happiness than you have ever known. Of this I can personally testify. May he be with you, now and always, until you read again.

(The video that you see is of a song that has helped me through this long process. It has reminded me that even in the very depths of despair my God and my King are right there beside me. More than that it has helped me come to see that He has always had a firm hold on my heart until He gives me a way to a faithful priesthood holder that will love me, protect me, and fight for me for all eternity. He knows the deepest desire of my heart and I know that if I am faithful I receive them in His own time and in His own way. He has never abandon me before and He will not abandon me now)

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